What a magnificent and powerful force! We like to watch them at the 4th of July. We may not mind a little more of them in the bedroom. We witness them over the holidays; the frenzied energy at work to hit goals, or at home to hit expectations.
What if we view all eruptions as a magnificent and powerful force. The emotional eruptions of others, in our presence, is their chance to clear out their latent stuff. Our emotional discharge is the opportunity for us to purge unhealed parts of ourself.
What if when these eruptions happen we think “what a wonderful and powerful opportunity for change”! Instead we may think “WTF! What’s wrong with them. What just happened. What did I just partake in?”
What if we flip it! Wow that’s a lot of power, which also means a lot of potential to do great things. What if we hang up the phone and say thank you. Thank you for touching something alive inside of me. Thank you for the opportunity to see what came out of me.
We often view reactions and reactivity as a negative. Maybe that negative judgment is what creates a negative charge. Maybe if we step back in awe of the eruption two forces were able to create and sit with that, without judgment, we would actually be inspired by its power, instead of feeling drained by it.
This week I have the opportunity to do just that. After I replayed all the ways the other person was wrong (an exhausting, lower vibration and boring exercise) I stepped back to see what I could learn. Who cares what I said, what they said, what I meant, what they meant, what I think they did, what I think I did!
Instead I care very much about growing. What can I learn? What do I want? What is the fear we trigger in one another that we can have such a powerful reaction to one another? What change in me is now possible? As my good friend John shared, what would it look like to imagine me sipping tea and nibbling crumpets with this person, right in the middle of an explosion, laughing and having fun.
So I bought the person a gift. Something my family would enjoy. I wrote a note. I shared all the things I want, to hold the vision for creating them in our relationship. I apologized. It was heartfelt. Will it last? Will it change our dynamics? That is really none of my business. It has changed my state today! It has freed my mind of disturbance; a wasteful use of its awesome and magnificent power.
It’s allowed me to shift my focus to all the amazing gifts in my life; at a time when we have children who are at the age to be enraptured by its magic. I have been able to give myself the gift of emotional freedom.
Happy Holidays to me and therefore the world around me when I’m in a joyful state. For me there is no other gift to share and receive.